I've been feeling better for the most part. I've begun to accept the fact that it is indeed over between Thea and I and I'm trying to move on. Sometimes it still strikes me suddenly as if it happened yesterday, but I have to remind myself that it was two months ago now. (At least the fact gives a little bit of a cushion.) That state of denial kept me believing that we could still work things out, all the while she had already mourned the loss and moved on. I don't know when or how I'll be able to see her again, but I believe it is my turn now to have some space and time. Hopefully I can earn her trust again and we can continue to remain friends.
I've had plenty of distractions lately. This weekend has been full and fulfilling so far and as of this writing, it's barely Sunday morning. Lindsay and Tick stopped by Wednesday and instead of our usual routine of watching movies 'till late, we spent a lot of time just talking. It was refreshing to open up and share so much of what had been on my mind recently. We really don't talk about personal stuff anymore and I had become used to it over time. I still might not have noticed had she not mentioned something. Don't get so set in your ways that you can't open up to people you're close to.
Even after all that, we managed to watch an old video of Frank Zapa on Crossfire and two episodes of Red Dwarf
Work has been. . . well, it hasn't been entirely slow this week because I've had a couple of hectic nights, but over all I've been bored out of my fuzzy little mind. Others have been busy but I've had a lot of free time to wander around, find little odd-jobs and basically get warm-body pay. Several days tempted me to try leaving early but the only night I would actually need that time was Friday. I clocked out two hours early but somehow managed to use up an hour and a half of that puttering around and getting ready for later.
Monica has had a few get-togethers with friends lately, myself included. Friday night she planned “My So-Called Sleepover” (my name, not hers) to get a bunch of people together to watch My So-Called Life, a favourite series from her youth that ran while she was still in school. From what little research I did prior to Friday I wasn't really interested in the show, but I do like parties – at least, the sort of parties my friends organize – and this would satisfy my continuing need for company as of late.
I also found out that my invitation had an ulterior motive. Lindsay brought her friend Beth from work and wanted to introduce us since we are both single. I was looking forward to this for obvious reasons, and it weighed the occasion with a bit more significance. Perhaps that's why I took a little extra time getting ready.
I still showed up in my pajamas, and found the apartment already full. They hadn't started the series yet and there was time for introductions before I settled in. I was surprised to find sacredspud there, tho' I shouldn't have been since we know many of the same people. I had the pleasure of meeting Beth as well, tho' regrettably that part of the evening wasn't very conducive to conversation since the night's feature was just starting and all eyes were on the screen for the most part. I was also struck by the curse of having little to say as I often do when near new people that I want to get to know. It makes me concerned that I'm coming across as trying too hard, or just plain creepy. Regardless, she seemed to laugh a few times at my comments during Sean of the Dead (between episodes), and I didn't do anything obviously obnoxious or stupid before she left so I needn't worry about creeping her out just yet. Plus, Lindsay has been kind enough to put in a few good words for me so with hope, we can eventually meet and chat and discuss plans for world unification under our iron-fisted rule.
On a side note, on at least three occasions throughout the rest of the night/morning Lindsay asked if I thought Beth(y) was cute – probably since we didn't do much other than look at each other from time to time. I replied yes, of course she is, but that isn't entirely accurate. The fact is, she's gorgeous. Now that I've admitted this I wonder how much is going to find its way back to her.
The rest of the night went well except for a minor snag: Monica became bored of the show after two episodes! Perhaps it was the general mood of the crowd or that it just didn't have the same impact it did when she first saw it years ago, but we ended up just watching movies for the rest of the night.
Caleb and I happened to go outside at the same time to retrieve some somethings from our vehicles, so I took the opportunity to show him my “new” Virtual Boy hard case (which I had secreted along despite being forbidden by Lindsay.) He oohed and ahhed enough to convince me that he'll eventually find one for himself. We bonded over Virtual Boy, Katamari Damacy and other things. He's officially cool.
The tape of Margret Cho didn't work out because it was more of a documentary on her than a stand-up routine. Somehow, someone managed to start up Silverado, a western from 1985 with a cast that you don't normally see in westerns like Kevin Costner, Jeff Goldblum and John Cleese. Everything and everyone looked so clean it was unnatural. All their clothes were new and the town looked like it was built yesterday (probably because it was.) The first half-hour to hour was fun through the character introductions and establishment of the story, but once the main plot kicked in it became too serious for my taste and I wearied. At one point I asked what time it was and Lindsay replied “Yeah, I wish it was over too.” Throughout the film all I could think of was “here comes the Strong Baaaaad. Here comes the Strong Baaaaad!”
The next movie wasn't much better, despite the title Better Than Chocolate. A self-serving film with no real plot that depicts lesbians as the most loving, caring, wonderful people in the world, and straight men as hateful, violent, skin-headed Nazis. Well, perhaps not so much Nazis. At least it had some great love scenes.
After that things pretty much petered out. It was nearing seven and people were tired. Ahnika and her roommate had to leave but Lindsay was still awake and tried to get everyone to go out to breakfast. She eventually convinced me but Caleb discovered Katamari Damacy and that was the end of that. Sweet sleep finally came.
After three hours I took Lindsay home and returned to feed my fish and wonder what I should do with myself for the rest of the day. Inspired, I called sacredspud to do lunch at Ella's. I tried for the first time ever matzo ball soup, fried pickles and a stuffed potato and we both agreed they were all quite good.
Later, we went to the used game store where I bought Castlevania: Symphony of the Night, which I am told is very good, and Martian Gothic which I was warned against only after the purchase. This explains why the former was $30 and the latter was priced less than the PS version of Pong. At the used book store I found a couple more Jamiroquai albums and a Chaosium book I knew I didn't have. Colin picked up the extra copy of the book and asked my opinion of the movie Leonard, Part 6, which will probably warn him against consulting my movie tastes in future. Hopefully he won't be out much money.
When we returned to my place we managed to transfer songs he'd found for my BF Gunn project, but only after much difficulty. There will be more info on this compilation to come another day.
Once he was on his way I decided to take a walk, despite the light rain that had finally decided to fall after an afternoon of threats. I went down the hill and walked along the highway to search for Kero-Chan. Jon gave me the little stuffed toy as a souvenir from Acen before I began attending. There was a suction cup to hold it to a window and I mistakenly had it displayed in my car for a few months before the weather improved. When the first nice day came along a couple weeks ago I rolled down all my windows on the way to work and subsequently lost the poor little guy. I know which stretch of road he vanished on because I noticed the empty chain striking the glass just after it happened, so I walked all the way down both sides of the road in search. Kero-Chan was nowhere to be seen but I did find a hot pink super ball and a cell phone. The former is still new but the later had lost its flip-up screen, which I found a few feet further on. I managed to piece it back together so it looks fine, but it will thankfully never work again. I kept it for the entertainment value. It'll be fun to see peoples' reactions when I casually use it to scrape ice from my windshield or prop open a door.
I still needed to change the water in my aquarium this weekend so I played Evil Dead: Fistful of Boomstick for much longer than I should have. I probably did some other stuff but the memory fades. Needless to say, I didn't get a lot of sleep until Sunday night.
Sunday morning I had to work for four hours which I barely remember as usual. This was followed by not changing the water in the aquarium again and puttering around the house. I finally finally collected all the Pocky boxes I've been saving for the past two years and stacked them into two grocery bags for the trash. If anyone wants empty Pocky boxes for projects or anything now is the time to speak up. They're being dumped this Thursday morning.
Somewhere along the line I watched Back to the Future --> Part II and played more video games until Jon arrived. He messaged me the night before and invited me to the mall where Waldenbooks had a 3 for 2 sale on manga and where writers and artists from Studio Antithesis were there to give a presentation and talk about creating your own comics. I had never heard of them before but it was fun and afterward I bought a book and a print and had them autographed.
On our way back we stopped by Woodmans where I decided it was good that I didn't live near an outlet because of the immense variety available. I saw a lot of things I wanted to try but managed to come away with only a case of diet coconut cream pie soda, beef stew in bulk and a bag of Tarro chips. Mmmm.
At home, the rest of the evening was also spent not changing the water in my aquarium. I discovered a message on my answering machine from Lindsay threatening to visit sometime that night. I tried calling back but the number she was at was perpetually busy and her home phone was “temporarily disconnected. . . CKCKCCKHHH!!!” She and Tick dropped by a couple hours later but I was prepared. We hung out as per usual, chatted and watched a couple more episodes of Red Dwarf. Apparently I didn't make much of an impression on Beth Friday night but no impression is better than a bad impression. Lindsay also managed to find out that my looks are “ok.” Urm... ok.
I overslept through another doctor's appointment Monday morning. I've done that a couple times within the past year and it really annoys me. At least in this case I had the excuse of seven total hours of sleep all weekend but I still could have gone to bed earlier Sunday night and looked at my calendar on the way to since it's right there and labled “Dr. 9:30AM) on the 18th. So I called to reschedule for sometime in May after Acen. I should call back and see if they'll give me a reminder head's up the day before. I really appreciate those.
Tick and Lindsay stopped by again tonight (finally being Monday as I finally finish this entry... well, Tuesday morning) with Caleb in tow and a splendid time was again had by all. I was a little busier than usual this time as I finally took some time to change the water in my aquarium as we visited. Later, Caleb played more Katamari while the rest of us beat the hell out of each other with foam swords out on my deck. Then more Dwarf. Then it was two in the morning, everyone left and I started continuing this entry. Everyone got that?
Note, must remember to purchase seasons V & VI of you-know-what soon. Anyone interested in another marathon?
Must remember to check the mail religiously this week. Grandma called last Friday to tell me that one of her CDs matured and she's giving me the money – another chunk of my inheritance I don't deserve. This isn't for fun tho' as she insisted that I put it toward my mortgage and I do not argue one bit. I'm going to do some shuffling tho', as I have a couple expensive months ahead. Rather than put it entirely toward the principle and be stuck with another payment due the next month, I'll use part of it to get a few months ahead and then attack the principle. This should help considerably with my other bills as well as put me a few years closer to owning this house. Thank you Grandma.
Ok, I'm done. It's late. It's time for
Very good. Anyone who has read through all this way gets a cookie from Hal.
J I M O U T -
P.S. Does anyone know why the words “Red Dwarf” keeps showing as green in this entry even though I'm putting “red” in the HTML tag?