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Evil Jim

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09:12 pm: Early Food Day
So I just now returned from work and... Yes, I know I'm home early. I used some vacation time and left early because I'm never productive after Thanksgiving dinner anyway. So I... Yes, I know Thanksgiving isn't until next week. Let me finish.

My company had their annual Thanksgiving dinner today, this time back in the samples area where normally all the flyers and documentation and catalogs for the products are stored. Most of that area was cleared out and cleaned up to make room for tables and chairs and the like. There was the typical T-day fare including turkey, stuffing, mashed potatoes, cranberrys, etc. etc. You know the drill. This year I actually brought something other than my appetite; a fresh homemade batch of hot dog soup.

Yes, that's right. I won't make you go back and reread it. Hot dog soup. For most people this seems like quite a peculiar idea, but it works and works well. I'm sad to say I ended up taking much of it home, even tho' I'm not surprised. I don't think it's a common item on any grandmother's holliday cooking agenda. A couple people tried and said it was pretty good, and if there's a pot luck in future I'll likely bring it again (not the leftovers, I mean. A new batch) and present it with more flair. It's good stuff. No, really.

I did have my fill there tonite. Most people hung around for an hour before returning to their jobs. I stayed the whole time since I was hungry and wouldn't have time to do anything useful anyway since the dinner started an hour before I was to leave. I sampled and enjoyed everything. Now I won't need to eat again for three days which is convenient because that's when my next Thanksgiving dinner is, this time at Grandma's.

My mother's mother, I should point out, is the best cook in the world. Shut up, she is. She's been cooking home cooked meals from scratch for sixty years and it shows. That's right, *sixty.* Emeril can kiss my frying pan. Anyway, my family is visiting her on the weekend this year so she can have more help in the kitchen. Otherwise, she'd do it all herself and that's a little tiring these days. I'd help if I knew anything about cooking, but I can at least wash the dishes and play gopher... Provided I can still walk by then.

It's definitely one of my favourite holidays, right there next to Halloween and my own birthday. No mass-merchandising tie-ins, no sucking up to imaginary beings, nothing requiring you waste money on relatives that don't deserve gifts and no depression for being the only person without a girlfriend. Just show up, eat, pass out and be thankful you have the next day off to recover. MMMMmmmmm. If I could stand up again I might go dip into the leftover soup cooling on the counter.

Ah yes, the soup again. I'll post the recipe for the benefit of my listeners (whether you exist or not.) Try it. It's better than it sounds. And next Thursday, be sure to hug Grandma on your way to the couch. She deserves it.

------------------------------ 'Ot Dog Soup ------------------------------
You will need:

4 Medium carrots cut into 1/2" slices

3 Medium potatoes, peeled if you wish and cubed whether you like it or not.

1 Medium onion, chopped

1/4 Cup of butter or Margarine

2 Tablespoons of Flour

1 Pound of hot dogs cut into 1/2" slices (or however thin you feel like slicing them. I don't care; I don't have to eat your mistake.)

1 12 Ounce can of evaporated milk

1 Can of cream of mushroom soup

1 Cup of water (Note: blood will not work, it's too thick. You can add it later as a garnish before serving)

1 Teaspoon of dried basil (whatever that is)

1/2 Teaspoon of pepper

How to do it:

In a soup kettle, large saucepan or extra large skull of foe, melt the margarine and saute carrots, potatoes and little onion bits (you did chop them, right?) for five minutes or so on high heat. Then stir in the flour until it's blended. Add the rest of the ingredients a single piece at a time, uttering the appropriate magic word with each one. Then stir SLOWLY three times clockwise and three times... oh wait! That's for Gummyberry Juice. I'm sorry, where was I? Um... After the flour is blended, dump the rest of the ingredients into the skull and bring to a boil, stirring occasionally. When you're sick of stirring, reduce the heat to medium and cover. No, the soup, silly. Get up off the floor. Simmer for 25 to 30 (or so) minutes until the vegetables are tender. Stir occasionally so it doesn't burn to the bottom of the skull. Makes 2 quarts. Eat. Enjoy.
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